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Hello world. again.

So it’s been about 3.5 months since I first started this blog and first posted. Well…this is awkward isn’t it? I started a blog announcing my new life/new me, but then I kind of just abandoned it.

My dearest Rice Whine, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for not maintaining you and feeding you with content. I’m sorry to those few readers who were kind of excited to see what I would post next (which never came till now). Most of all, I want to apologize to myself. In not updating this blog and writing out my thoughts and goals, I let myself down. I constantly put blogging on my to do list, but I never checked it off and just left it there. This made me feel very unsettled because everyday it felt like I hadn’t accomplished what I had set out to do. I just kept pushing it back but today I just told myself, “bitch no more of this.” (after watching Riverdale and my 3rd depression nap)

So….what better way to try to get back on track than to write a New Years blog (17 days later)?

I thought I’d revive my blog by just talking about some things that were always on my to do list, like blogging, that I just never got to. As you can tell I’m somebody who likes to write to do lists, not somebody who’s particularly good at finishing to do lists though. However, I heard from from a little birdie (~cough~ The Secret ~cough~), that in order to get what you want, you need to let the universe know, so that the universe can manifest it for you.

A list of Shirley’s Goals (in no particular order)

  • Create more content because I find myself the happiest when I’ve created something. This includes:
    • Blogging for RiceWhine
    • Blogging for mybadideas.com
    • Posting on social a little more. I used to post a lot of ~excuse my language~ shit on instagram but then I just kind of stopped. I’m not too sure why, maybe influencers overtook my feed and I was just like okay ( ̄︿ ̄) I guess my pictures aren’t actually nice . I think that in a digital age, our social accounts are in a way an extension of ourselves. I’d like to share more of me, put myself out there, be vulnerable in what I create, and not care too much about it. Gnome sayin’?
    • Vlogging/Podcast – I’ve always wanted to start vlogging just cause I like talking and the sound of my voice (am I a narcissist? ~gasp~). I’ve just had trouble starting and maintaining youtube. I think vlogging is an even more vulnerable outlet. You’re talking into a camera, but really you’re talking to somebody on the other side. I guess all it takes is just to try it once?
  • Learn Spanish (hola is this not the most caliente language ever???)
  • Learn basic coding – HTML/CSS – Just think about it, one day your kid is going to come up to you and be like, “yo ma, help me with this code.” You’ll just be like, “kid, I’m dumb.” In all honestly in such a tech-driven, digital world, it may be useful to just know a little code so I can maybe survive a robot apocalypse?
  • Try stand up comedy – Many people (wow am I full of myself?…”many people” ~scoff~ ) have occasionally mentioned that I should try stand up. This year I’d like to sign up and try a Second City stand up class. I think it’d be funny right? I mean I can already picture myself on stage, hand holding a mic, legs shaking, pee starting to drip down my inner thigh…WAIT THIS DOESN’T SOUND FUN.
  • Look like a hot instagram thotI know I KNOWWWW I should love myself and practice self love, but this is just a part of my self-deprecating persona. Of course I’d like to be healthy by eating healthy and working out, BUT I MEAN there is a little part of me (BIG PART OF ME) that wouldn’t mind posting pics of my abs à la Kendall Jenner through a mirror selfie. No but in all honesty, I haven’t been treating my body the best in the last few years. If my dad can go running and to the gym every day, what do I as someone in my 20s really have as an excuse to not be healthy? CLOGGED ARTERIES AREN’T COOL GUYS. #Hotfor2019. I also try my best not to be too negative when it comes to looks or to constantly compare myself to others. Instead the way I think of it is, if you want to look like that, “You better work bitch.” So yes you can find me at the gym doing Strong Curves trying to get a booty.
The Queen speaking the truth
  • Do more of what makes me happy – You know those moments where you do something and you’re like, “wow I’m happy, this is something I like doing.”? I get those moments usually after hanging out with people love and doing things I love. This usually ends up being exploring coffee shops, trying new restaurants, and browsing random stores and art galleries on a sunny Sunday afternoon. I just haven’t done that in awhile, but each time I do, it it makes me happy. So it’s a simple and logical goal that is sometimes put on the back burner. This leads to my next goal
  • Discovering more of Toronto – In Montreal, I had routines. After work, I’d go to the SAQ, pick up a bottle of wine, invite an unsuspecting friend over, and cook for them. Friday nights, you could find me in the old port in a boogie club, trying to be my best r@v3r g!rl at New City Gas, or shamelessly dancing at Newspeak. Sundays were reserved for brunch, cafés, the Mile End, and roaming the Plateau. I miss these routines and thus I’d love to discover more of Toronto so that I can create new routines here that maybe, someday…when I’m living in my artist loft filled with plants in Brooklyn, I’ll also say I miss.

Now in terms of school, as some of you may or may not know, I’m back at schoo0o0o0o0ol, I also have some goals:

  • Be on top of my work – We take 4 classes a quarter. It may not seem much but sometimes with projects, work can really pile up. Because there are only 4 classes, sometimes I feel like I just push my work to be done closer to when it’s due. The problem with is, like not finishing a to do list, the work still lingers in the air when it’s not done. Mentally this prevents me from working on other things that I would like to do like aprendiendo español.
  • Read 3 advertising books – Pretty clear and simple. I just want to absorb more knowledge about the industry that I’m entering.
  • Pick between copy or art – I signed up for this program as a copywriter, but now I’m really attracted to art direction. My goal is to hone in on one of these crafts, instead of dangling between both.

As always, I want to live with intention. I’m not down to spend my whole life watching Netflix and taking depression naps when I feel overwhelmed. I admit sometimes those moments are very much needed for one’s wellbeing, but in the end I just want to spend this year doing more of what makes me happy. Simple as that.

Wow…that felt good writing all this out. So if you were able to make it to the bottom of this post. Congratulations!!! Let’s be friends (but like actually plz this is my cry for help/friends)! Let me know if you have any resources or inspiration that could help me with my goals, it would be much appreciated.ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ